The Quotations Archive currently contains 1744 quotations.

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A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.

-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.

-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.

-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.

-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.

-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada

Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable.

-- John Kenneth Galbraith

Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.

-- John Kenneth Galbraith

I'll moider da bum.

-- Tony Galento, heavyweight boxer, when asked what he thought of William Shakespeare

I could prove God statistically.

-- George Gallup

Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.

-- John Galsworthy

All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.

-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story

Consciously or unconsciously, every one of us does render some service or other. If we cultivate the habit of doing this service deliberately, our desire for service will steadily grow stronger, and will make, not only our own happiness, but that of the world at large.

-- Gandhi

Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress.

-- Gandhi

I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.

-- Gandhi

I think it would be a good idea.

-- Gandhi, when asked what he thought of Western civilization

There is more to life than increasing its speed.

-- Gandhi

We must become the change we want to see.

-- Gandhi

Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is most important that you do it.

-- Gandhi

Where there is love there is life.

-- Gandhi

You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.

-- Indira Gandhi

Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.

-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying

I like nonsense -- it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope...and that enables you to laugh at all of life's realities.

-- Theodor S. Geisel, a.k.a. "Dr. Seuss"

Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as children.

-- Libby Gelman-Waxner

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance.

-- King George V

The meek shall inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights.

-- J. Paul Getty

He who laughs last didn't get it.

-- Helen Giangregorio

Success is just a matter of attitude.

-- Darcy E. Gibbons

It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations.

-- Khalil Gibran

It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.

-- Andre Gide

Whoever controls the media--the images--controls the culture.

-- Allen Ginsberg

We love because it's the only true adventure.

-- Nikki Giovanni

There is nothing so wrong in this world that a sensible woman can't set it right in the course of an afternoon.

-- Giraudoux

We look forward to the time when the power to love of will replace the love of power. Then will our world know the blessings of peace.

-- William Gladstone

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.

-- Jackie Gleason

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

-- George Gobel

I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for half the money.

-- Arthur Godfrey

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

-- Gail Godwin

Age does not make us childish, as some say; it finds us true children.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

More light!

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, dying words

Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if possible, speak a few reasonable words.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The artist alone sees spirits. But after he has told of their appearing to him, everybody sees them.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The society of women is the element of good manners.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

There is a courtesy of the heart; it is allied to love. From it springs the purest courtesy in the outward behavior.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are capable of being.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Viewed from the summit of reason, all life looks like a malignant disease and the world like a madhouse.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

What does not kill me makes me stronger.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

When ideas fail, words come in very handy.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

When we treat man as he is, we make him worse than he is; when we treat him as if he already were what he potentially could be, we make him what he should be.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.

-- Sidney Goff

America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.

-- Bobcat Goldthwait

Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.

-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting married

Remember that happiness is a way of travel, not a destination.

-- Roy Goodman

It is a known fact that men are practical, hardheaded realists, in contrast to women, who are romantic dreamers and actually believe that estrogenic skin cream must do something or they couldn't charge sixteen dollars for that little tiny jar.

-- Jane Goodsell

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo.

-- Al Gore, U.S. Vice President

When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now completely frappe!"

-- Graham

Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.

-- James Graham

If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them.

-- Robert Graves

The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it prevents you from achieving.

-- Russell Green

Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.

-- Colin Greene

I have a daughter who goes to SMU. She could've gone to UCLA here in California, but it's one more letter she'd have to remember.

-- Shecky Greene

These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder.

-- Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995

Hardly a year passes that fails to find a new, oft-times exotic, research method or technique added to the armamentarium of political inquiry. Anyone who cannot negotiate Chi squares, assess randomization, statistical significance, and standard deviations is less than illiterate; he is preconscious.

-- A. James Gregor, An Introduction to Metapolitics, 1971

I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.

-- Wayne Gretzky

I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

-- Lewis Grizzard

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

-- Lewis Grizzard

Silence is argument carried out by other means.

-- Ernesto "Che" Guevara

A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands.

-- Sacha Guitry

An ideal wife is one who remains faithful to you but tries to be just as charming as if she weren't.

-- Sacha Guitry

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

-- Sacha Guitry